Every time I look across the room and I catch the pretty brunette staring at me, I can't help but think of a time when I would have walked over there, spoke with her for a few minutes and ended up going home with her for the night. My, how times have changed. I've gone from sleeping with anyone and everyone that would have me to only sleeping with one person. Only wanting to be with one person.
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After losing my virginity and everything involved in that situation, I swore I would never be in a relationship. Relationships, love, and all of that nonsense were nothing but tools made to hurt you.
The first time I had casual sex, I was fifteen. My brother, Marco, was trying to cheer me up. I had been kind of depressed for awhile. He decided to take me to a movie and while we were getting popcorn and nachos and all that stuff, he whispered in my ear that the cashier was checking me out. I didn't believe him at first, but when I looked up and made eye-contact with her, she looked away and blushed.
During the movie I went to get a refill of popcorn and gave the girl my phone number, making sure she understood I was only interested in a one-time, no-strings-attached kind of thing. Imagine my surprise when she actually called me back. I ended up meeting her at her place. She was eighteen and had her own apartment. I later found out she thought I was older than her. Ever since I hit puberty, I've always looked a few years older than my age. I'd like to think in a sexy, older man kind of way though.
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I actually lost my virginity to a man. After that incident, I pretty much stuck with women. It wasn't really a preference or anything. It just seemed women were safer, you know? They were easier to deal with, easier to predict than men, or at least that one man I had been with. It just seemed like a better idea to stay with women. I wouldn't let myself fall into that same trap. I wouldn't get hurt.
It took me a year or two after losing my virginity before I slept with a man again. I had to be around seventeen. One of the boys on the school soccer team had been dropping hints for a week or so. When I ran into him on the street outside of school we made plans to meet later that night at his place. And I learned the pleasures of topping. He was the first guy I ever topped, and he definitely wasn't the last. I was with a different girl or guy for what seemed like every other day until I reached twenty.
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When I was twenty, I met this girl, Elizabeth, at my job of the week. Elizabeth came in to pay for her gas, we flirted a bit, and I gave her my phone number, put the ball in her court. It was supposed to be a one time thing, but the sex was amazing, really great, almost as good as it is with Drew. So we ended up hooking up again and again and eventually we were kind of seeing each other. Not really dating or anything, but we would end up getting together like once a week.
At the time it was against the rules I had for myself. It was a big deal. I had sworn I would never be in a relationship. But the thing with Elizabeth was remarkably close. So, I changed the rules. Relationships were okay as long as I didn't get too attached, if I didn't let my emotions get involved. And with Elizabeth it was just about sex, nothing else. That ended after about six months, when she met some guy at a gas station. I guess it's where she went to pick up guys.
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I spent the next seven years in a series of pseudo-relationships, never getting too attached. Fuck, I was in a relationship with Sheila just because I needed a place to live. But when I was twenty-seven, I met Drew. Drew, who's unlike anyone I've ever met. Drew, who I actually have feelings for. Drew, who's...walking toward me.
"You ready to go, baby?"
"Yeah, let's go."
The End
fiction by juneprota